[ the hand in his hair feels so, so good - he shudders when therion tangles into it, pulling it. sends a stripe of electric pain-pleasure down his spine, makes one of his thrusts more of a jerk forward than anything with finesse, and it's with that pull that he registers that the heat is building fast, that he's getting close. with a gasping moan, his hand drags down to rest against therion's stomach, his lower abdomen, almost like if he tried, he could feel himself there, deep as he is, and his ears pin back and stay that way.
and when therion cracks, when he groans like that - it's just loud enough for jiaoqiu's sensitive ears to catch, and he thinks, reward him for it. somewhere in his overheated, racing flood of thoughts, he thinks to do something to keep teaching him that sounds aren't pathetic or stupid, that they're incredibly hot. he doesn't know what and doesn't have the brainpower to think that hard about it, but he tries. therion's arms go a little weak, and jiaoqiu holds him up and breathes, yes, yes, more against his ear, running his tongue along the piercings there. more. it's okay - it's wanted. the way jiaoqiu responds to those sounds breaks his control every time - makes him snap his hips roughly at slightly different angle, like he's trying to find one that will make therion give in.
and then he lets go of jiaoqiu's hair to try and touch himself and the noise jiaoqiu lets out is most definitely a snarl, something low and deep and rumbling in his chest, something meaner than usual. no, that's his. he wants to touch, therion's not allowed, and the best way to make sure that he can't touch himself is - well. do it himself.
so he pulls his hand from where it's resting at his abs and slaps that seeking hand away. claws down therion's stomach to get his fingers around therion's cock instead, stroking from base to tip in time with each thrust. it's just tight enough to give therion room to fuck up into his fist if he wants to, to make a mess. his own rhythm is starting to get frantic, breath shaking in the way that therion knows means he's starting to unravel, pulse throbbing where he's buried, chest heaving against therion's back. ]
[ whatever he's doing, it's working. maybe it's the praise - the soft words against his ear make him feel something, get him to shudder in jiaoqiu's arms. or maybe it's the new angle, because that hits just right, because he thrusts down and and therion sees stars. maybe it's the hand on his stomach - he's done the same thing before, when he's had jiaoqiu bent in half and wondered the very same, a wild fuck that even then felt a little claiming. there's something about being claimed that he can't examine, about being wanted that settles some beast in his soul.
or, you know, maybe it's the moved hand and the growl in his ear. he can't help himself, the hah he lets out almost a laugh, a wild grin sliding across his face, because for every sweet moment, the reminder of what's actually happening hits him again, about how wild and ridiculous he got over this dumb outfit, but the thought fades instantly as jiaoqiu's hand wraps around his cock. this time, he does moan, half surprised out of him and half overwhelmed at the sensation - and the bells jingle violently as he snaps his hips forward into the pressure of his fist. he grabs back onto the covers, higher above his head, white knuckles them and bumps his hips up again, thighs spreading out wider. he can feel jiaoqiu's pulse, th-thump, th-thump, with every thrust forward, and his grip reminds him of fucking him, of having him sprawled out underneath him, and he lets out another noise, but it's not quite - ]
Go - [ therion takes a deep, gasping breath, words dying as jiaoqiu hits so close to what he wants, so close, but not quite, and he turns his head to the side and looks at him over his shoulder, eyes dark, almost desperate, red and flushed, wanting, wanting. ] - slower, fuck, Jiaoqiu --
[ a request you might not expect - maybe even one that could jar the mood, but it'll be worth it, it'll be so worth it. even being able to ask for it is a huge recognition of the safety of that whispered "yes, more" in his ear, of being a participant and not just something to be used and tossed aside. ]
[ it takes a second for it to register - he's a little lost in it, and he almost misses the request.
but - he does hear it, he hears his name, and then slower clicks a second later, and he lets out a pathetic little whine at the notion, but. he does. he drags in a shuddery, wet breath, buries his face between therion's shoulder blades, and slows down. shakes a bit, with it, because therion's legs are spread and the moan he let out was hot, and the way he's clutching at the sheets in front of him makes jiaoqiu feel insane, makes him want to lick and bite and claim, makes him want to fill therion until he's dripping. his pulse is thudding in his ears, and he's twitching inside therion, hopelessly turned on. later he's going to be a little mortified at how far the animal instincts take him, but right now he isn't thinking about anything else.
in this moment, therion asks him, and jiaoqiu is just present enough to know that being able to ask is important. it means something. so he lifts his head from where he'd had it pressed and meets therion's gaze, eyes hazy and mouth open in a pant. he looks punchdrunk, and his lashes flutter, his fangs bite absently at his bottom lip as he sinks slowly into therion, pressed flush against his ass. for a moment, he just stays seated, doesn't move, obedient. he pauses in stroking therion's dick too, slick hand dragging up therion's stomach and chest to pet at him, fingers tracing over shivering, trembling muscles. he's listening. he'll slow down.
when his hips pick up again, it is slower, but no less deep. jiaoqiu finds himself wishing therion had a tail so he could use it for leverage, but he makes do, keeping his hand on therion's torso instead of his cock, wanting to feel his breathing, wanting to feel his sounds as well as hear them. he's just as physically close as before, plastered over therion's back, damp with sweat and nose filled with the scent of them, not looking away from therion as he pumps his hips at a slower, steady pace. ]
[ the feeling of him twitching inside of him makes him shiver, a full body thing that makes the coins and bells ring softly, the motion more gentle and seeming to vibrate through the room in the silence between the two of them. they lock eyes, and the look on jiaoqiu's face - the fact that he keeps looking as he sinks in makes him clench around jiaoqiu, has him suck in a harsh, deep breath through his nose to keep from going off at the sight, at the feeling.
the hands on his body feel twice as sensitive as jiaoqiu's buried deep inside of him like that - his hands, his nails, the wetness of his own precome spread up his stomach and chest, it's a lot, but now that jiaoqiu's not going as frantically, it gives him a second to get his bearings. in that little moment, all that trust makes his heart of all things squirm hard, and for as vulnerable as he feels, it's safe, too. if he thinks about it too much, he'll drown in it. he can lick and bite and claim and fill as much as he wants - embarrassingly, it is in this moment over all of the others today that mine really starts to hit, and he stares at him for a second, overwhelmed.
aaand...mortifying. time to get on with it! now, with jiaoqiu still plastered to his back and a slower pace, therion readjusts his weight. he pushes up higher on his knees, practically bending himself in half, hiking jiaoqiu up a little in the process, which helps jiaoqiu slide another inch deep into him, and that - that's exactly it, that's exactly what he wants. though jiaoqiu's still looking at him, therion cannot return the favor; his eyes nearly roll back in his head when he pulls back and thrusts in at that slow, deep pace, at that new angle, and he turns his face back down towards the covers, forehead resting on the bed, fisting his hands again as another noise melts out of his mouth, a low, needy moan. and then another. he won't last long like this, but the slower they go, the deeper it is, and each full, slow thrust down hits that same spot he likes - he clenches around jiaoqiu, hard, shudders as he comes back out, enough to rattle the bells and coins again, emphasis to each deep, perfect, thrust, emphasis to the rough, needy noises coming out of his mouth.
its another show of that trust - another show of letting go, bit by bit. ]
[ listening was the right decision for so many reasons.
this angle makes it hard to lean over him entirely, but he thinks maybe that's okay. he thinks the tradeoff is having therion sprawled under him like this. what a fucking sight it is, therion bent in half, the dancer outfit rumpled and askew. and the noise. it's music to his ears, and said ears press straight up to hear every single bit of it. therion asked him for what he wanted and jiaoqiu is so, so happy to give it to him, to watch him let his walls come down, watch him soak in the pleasure of losing control. panting harshly, jiaoqiu keeps that pace, and leans forward just enough to slide his hands up therion's spine and drag his claws down therion's back, leaving red lines behind. it's almost funny to do, because even when jiaoqiu is on top he manages to find a way to scratch the shit out of therion. somewhere in there, he tangles his fingers into the fabric of the top, pulling it taut, rubbing it between his fingers, listening to the gold coins rattle each time he fucks into him.
the animal instinct sticks at the forefront of his mind. he watches therion press his face into the mattress and moan like he needs this, and jiaoqiu desperately wants to bite him, his mouth almost watering with it. each perfect, hot clench around his cock makes him feel like he's on fire; the slower pace means that he feels every inch. he's damp with sweat and his muscles are screaming at him, but all of that is just fuel - he trembles with each thrust, hands finally coming back to rest on therion's hips, kneading at his ass, absently spreading him further and watching therion's muscles flex and relax when he slides in to the hilt.
there's no way he can last like this, he was already on the edge.
it's just a couple of moments of this pace - he does his very best to not speed up, and on one of therion's needy moans, his whole body tenses. desperately, he breathes out: ] A-ah, Therion --
[ and his hips judder violently, his hands holding therion's hips so tightly he will leave bruises. head falling back, he spills inside therion, hot, wet pulses, gasping. his vision blurs, whites out, the pleasure washing over him and nearly wiping him out.
for just a second, he stays there, shaking, and then - he starts moving again, picking up that same slow, deep pace, still hard enough to hit that spot inside therion as best he can with each push. the way is slick, helped by his release, and the sound is obscene; jiaoqiu moans, low and guttural, overwhelmed, but he doesn't quit. he just curls over therion and grabs therion by the thighs, pulling him back onto his cock with an attempt to keep his gasps soft so he can hear therion lose it. ]
[ he'll find the scratches funny later, but right now, it's just hot, another stripe of sensation that makes the hair on the back of his neck stand up, has him arching further up into the scratches, his shoulders rolling near his ears when he grabs the top and pulls it up - pulled taut, it causes a stripe of absurdly hot friction across the already swollen buds on his chest, startling another "oh, fuck" out of his mouth, unbidden, the jingling of the coins just background noise to the overwhelming build of pleasure. he's losing track of anything and everything that isn't jiaoqiu, that isn't just taking what he wants - or maybe in this case, just being taken - that when his hips judder, he realizes what's happening a second too late.
and it's not the first time, but god, it's easy to forget - jiaoqiu releases, the sensation hot and filling, and his mouth falls open, eyes going wide before they melt closed again, hips tilting upwards a little further, thighs trembling. he pulls his legs closer again, squeezing tight around jiaoqiu as he releases him, milking out every drop, and the heat in his stomach, his groin, almost agonizingly close to getting off. in the past, this would be it -- he'd get himself off out of view, maybe a rough, dry couple tugs depending on how generous darius was feeling, and for a brief second, he's almost expecting it when he slows down and trembles, and half dazed, he starts trying to put himself together again, find his composure, make some shitty commentary and --
well, and then he moves again. the noise that comes out of therion is almost a croon when he slams back down, half startled out of his mouth, grabbing onto the sheets for dear fucking life. it's wet and messy, leaking around jiaoqiu when he plunges back into him, down the insides of his thighs, and he feels so hypersensitive to that that even that sensation makes him jerk, desperately, the coins erratically jingling out of rhythm, now. close, he's so fucking close, basically untouched, and as he starts to push himself half up on his elbows to make sure he gets closer, make sure he doesn't pull too far away, make sure he gets off, jiaoqiu grabs onto his thighs, all fingertips and bruises and claws, slamming him back down to the base of his cock, and then noise therion makes is obscene. he throws one of his legs over the back of jiaoqiu's, and fucks himself in earnest back - once, deep enough that he sees starts, twice, and with jiaoqiu having already released in him and buried deep to the hilt, therion makes a strangled noise like a yelp that dissolves into a series of high, desperate moans as all that tension finally snaps, and his orgasm hits him, hard.
it makes a terrible mess - splattering the covers, the front of the costume, the belt, and therion's hips rock back and forth onto jiaoqiu, taking him faster again, desperately chasing out the friction and until he's spent out, and he just stays like that, trembling from head to toe, breathing hard. his forehead's still buried in the covers, hands still fisted in the sheets, and he just needs a minute to be there and bring himself properly back to earth. ]
[ jiaoqiu sort of just - lets therion take, the rest of the way. his ears are pressed back against his skull and he's riding so high that he almost feels like he's going to pass out, watching therion use him to finish. he likes that, likes the way therion slams back against him and uses his leg to get leverage, takes what he needs. jiaoqiu whimpers, embarrassingly, senses filled with the smell of sex and the sound of jingling coins, the sound of therion desperately crying out and moaning louder than jiaoqiu has ever heard him manage. his fur stands on end, his skin feels electric, and he holds his breath, trying to give him what he needs.
watching therion come - watching him ruin his costume, the damn thing that started all of this in the first place - is enough to make jiaoqiu come again.
it's just an extension of the first one - therion tightens so much around him and moans, and it floods jiaoqiu's senses. he's already wildly oversensitive as is, and it's not exactly another orgasm as it is just - therion comes, and jiaoqiu chokes on a moan, pulsing, spilling just a little bit more inside him. it's an awful, sticky mess, but he'd be lying if it doesn't appeal very, very much to his foxian brain, the feeling of really filling therion and leaking out of him. he's dizzy with it.
and then they're both absolutely spent, shaking and exhausted.
it's okay, he needs a minute too, panting desperately for air as he slumps over therion, pressing his face against therion's neck and hiding it there. he doesn't pull out, and he doesn't let go - he just hugs therion from behind, hooking one arm loosely across therion's chest and clinging to his shoulder, the other resting against therion's stomach, palms warm on his skin. his ears flick every couple of seconds, fluttery, because he's absolutely lost in post-orgasm bliss, breathing therion in, rubbing the mess into his skin. absolutely filthy. ]
[ somewhere in the haze of riding out his orgasm, he feels jiaoqiu seize up as he's taking him down to the hilt, and it makes him just - ] Fuck, Jiaoqiu -
[ partially in disbelief, partially in how he twitches buried deep in therion and another pulse of come is so hot that it makes him shudder through his orgasm again. it feels like he could taste it on the back of his tongue, there's so much, and that phantom sensation is enough to wipe out the rest of his thoughts as he temporarily blanks out, his hips lowering, though really only enough to make it easier for jiaoqiu to drape over him, trembling through each aftershock.
slowly, eventually, his eyes blink open. one terrible and one functioning, vision hazy, dizzy, and he comes back to semi-reality to jiaoqiu's hands all over him, rubbing... rubbing the mess in. it's not the first time he's done something similar, and honestly, he's still so dazed he doesn't even care, floating in the afterglow as all the endorphins melt through his body. so. therion just lets him do this - he is never the one to complain about a mess, that's jiaoqiu - lets him cling, and eventually, turns his head enough to barely bump it against jiaoqiu's where he's bowed over him, to let him know he's like, alive.
for once in his life, he does not have a damn shitty thing to say? he's not sure he can put his brain together enough to make words. ]
[ that's fair, jiaoqiu is offline. his brain is goo.
it takes him a second to even reply when therion bumps at him. he like, visibly reboots, making a soft noise that sounds almost like purring as he noses at therion's hair. he's so, so content. it's been a while since all of his body has been this relaxed. definition of fucked out, here.
they are. going to have to do so much laundry. good lord. but he's not thinking about that so much right now. instead, messily, he searches for therion's mouth so he can kiss him. lazily, and like, it's barely a kiss, it's kind of just because he's feeling wildly affectionate. but he tries!
after a moment, he rumbles, low and deep in his chest, and mumbles a garbled mess of something that probably was meant to be words. his tail eases over therion's leg, still possessive because he's in full lizard mode. ]
[ alright listen someone has to get their brains together around here. maybe? probably. he lets jiaoqiu kiss him - messy, turning his head to the side so he's not like, licking his face and actually kissing him. it lingers, and he pulls back, exhaling heavily. none of the embarrassment has hit him yet, which is good, because if he thinks about any of the last ten minutes for more than a second, he might pass away.
instead, he just swears again, a low "fuck", and shakes his head. what the fuck just happened. his entire body feels heavy, but the weighted blanket of jiaoqiu on his back is more of a blessing than it is a curse, and the benefit of him being equally fucked out is that he, exhausted, also thinks cuddling sounds good, and therion mutters: ] At least let me lay down, fluff.
[ god. he can tell jiaoqiu's still not fully there - he gets like this when they fuck sometimes, though today has been an especially unique experience for a variety of reasons - but hopefully with that he can ease down. he doesn't think jiaoqiu's going to want to pull out, and frankly, he can stay there - he moves slowly if he wants to stay attached, the jingles of the coins and bells that aren't currently sticking to his skin now silent as therion is conscious of his own movement, no longer fucked into forgetting about it. ]
[ in the state he's in he'd probably just be fine with licking therion's face, unfortunately,
another grumbly sound, but he seems to at least be a little more cognizant. a beat. he sighs, heavily, and then helps therion shift so that they can lay down. therion's right, though, he doesn't really want to pull out just yet, so he shifts them so that therion isn't crunched up on his knees, settling on their sides for now. this means he can spoon therion happily, his back to jiaoqiu's front, wrapping his arms around him and getting his hand under that stupid dancer top. in an inspired bratty movement that he's still capable of even when he's zoned out, he rattles the bells. hehe. make noise.
and then, sleepily, stroking his fingers up and down therion's front: ]
You're amazing. [ sincerely... it is a struggle to not just dazedly be like, i love you after all that, because he thinks therion might roll off the bed if he did.
he yawns, muffling it against therion's shoulder. ]
[ he gets his hand swatted when he rattles the bells - just on the top of the wrist, because if there's any blood left in his body, it's going to his face, flushing red as the gravity of all of this starts to hit him as they relocate. god, he hopes primrose was out for the evening, because there is no way that wasn't audible.
whatever. the back of his neck warms up under his sweaty hair - it gets worse, when jiaoqiu punch drunk compliments him right in his ear, and he snorts and rolls his eyes. ]
Oh, you can form sentences. [ like he's any better? he's not. his words are a little slurred - not only did he canvas and work half the day, but he's a normal person and not a foxian, and coming twice, the second having had his insides thoroughly scrambled, is pretty tiring. jiaoqiu isn't the only one who's tired. his voice is low and rumbly, fucked out and used, and he settles heavily here, held close, heart pounding hard underneath jiaoqiu's hand.
blearily, therion takes a minute to examine himself. he can't see much of what he's wearing from this angle, but the gauzy silky bits in the back and the sheer sleeves both are sticking to him from the sweat, and he has a feeling the rest of this is going to be sticky later, too. when he can move his limbs again, he's changing out of it. when he can move his limbs again. which may be never.
... though... eventually, there's a huff of something, a rumbled, amused chuckle. ] Costumes, huh.
[ if he wasn't exhausted he'd bite therion, but he is, and he's actually, funnily enough, not very inclined to hurt him right now in any fashion, playful or not. jiaoqiu just kind of wants to spoil him. and he will, actually, once he regains function. eventually.
for now, he presses soft kisses against therion's neck, where he's tucked close. strokes over his chest, like he can make his heartbeat settle down. it's okay. he doesn't need to be embarrassed or freaked out. it's all good. he's not going to turn it into something to dangle over therion's head, he's not going to make fun of him or taunt him.
the comment makes him huff, though. ]
... Just this one. [ a little ear flick. he's absolutely too three-orgasmed to be embarrassed. ] You shouldn't be surprised I find you attractive.
[ part of his rushing heart is from exertion, but jiaoqiu hits the nail on the head, that part of it is an instinctual reaction. he's not even really aware of it - but any tension that did build, small as it was, melts away between the conversation and the gestures, between jiaoqiu's warm hands and his warm body. the feeling of being held close, after this, is something he might not ever get used to, and it really hits differently after this particular romp.
he keeps that to himself, though, and lets himself float a little longer in the hazy post-orgasm bliss, closing his eyes. he can feel the wind from jiaoqiu's ear flicking. ]
No. [ yeah, of course that's not surprising. therion knows he's hot shit so he just agrees with that immediately. ] Just saying... wouldn't have said you were this into this yesterday, either.
[ his attempts at sass are again, extremely blunted. it sounds like there might be a smile on his face. ]
[ okay, well, therion gets pinched, because jiaoqiu cannot just let the sass fly without retaliation, but it's not hard and he soothes the skin after, brushing his fingers gently over the abused bit. ]
Your waist was... [ he starts, like he's trying to figure out how to describe why he's into it. a beat. ] I wanted to get my hands around it.
[ he punctuates this by sliding his hand down to rest on therion's side, the slight curve where his hip slopes. ]
I don't see you like that often. Your clothes are oversized. It hides you. [ not that that's a bad thing, it's just kind of like, oh! wow! he's got a a teeny waist and jiaoqiu has a lot of self control except for when it comes to wanting to fuck his tiny thief stupid, apparently. another little yawn. ]
I imagine there are things that drive you to base instinct as well.
[ he can't... think of anything about himself that would inspire that, because his self esteem is very poor, but hey. ]
[ there's a soft huff of a laugh when he gets pinched - his shoulders shake just once, amused at his own joke, but he listens. it is true, he does prefer to wear big clothes - a big hoodie, a poncho, layers on layers, anything to hide his shape. he doesn't really like to be perceived in any way, shape, or form, as a general rule.
but, well. with jiaoqiu... mmf. he starts to say something else, and then reverts to the sarcasm instead, muttering: ] I'm not the one with animal instincts.
[ there probably is something that can get therion riled up. he's slammed jiaoqiu into a wall once or twice over it, jumped him before he got a word out and fucked him silly. embarrassingly, the things that have gotten him the most riled have often been things that were softer in nature? moments where jiaoqiu proved therion's trust was well placed were the things that made him launch himself at him like a feral creature, which is both embarrassing and not something he wants to admit out loud no matter how comfortable he is, how floaty he feels.
after a moment of quiet, his eyes sliding shut, he thinks a little longer, and he says: ]
... You're the only one who gets to. [ it's a little bit of a non sequitir, a little stilted. ] See me that way. In general.
[ not just with the fucky costume, either - he gets a little embarrassed after he says it, and after a beat, he sets his hand gently on top of his, and leaves it there. ]
[ he smiles a little at that, genuinely, the animal instincts comment. he wriggles a little, like he's reminding them both that he's still inside therion, and then immediately regrets that because the zing of sensation it sends up his spine makes him hiss a bit. herugh. ]
You like it. [ he says, after a moment, tail wagging slightly behind him. another beat, and then very carefully he will pull out of therion because it's starting to get uncomfortable, but he does not let therion go anywhere. he likes it here and he will be enjoying his time getting to cuddle therion without therion complaining about it for thirty minutes.
and then he tells jiaoqiu that much, and - it's silly. he shouldn't get emotional about it, and, well, he doesn't, not really, not overly so. he does press a kiss to therion's cheek when he says so - and his heart clenches in his chest at the idea of being the only person therion lets see him like that. he knows the amount of trust and love that lives in that statement, and he keeps it close. holds onto it. another way to keep him grounded, here.
it's been months since he's gone under. it's wild.
jiaoqiu links their fingers loosely. ]
Well, that's good. [ he murmurs, lightly. ] Or I'd have to challenge someone to a duel, and we both know how that'd end.
[ he's joking, but the way he takes therion's hand and slides them up to rest over his chest, still clasped together - he hopes that gets across that he understands. ]
[ the noise comes out of his mouth as more of complaint than anything else, eyes screwing shut because not only is he still oversensitive, but it's a little cold and very wet, and he grumbles, ] Don't lose it again.
[ considering!!! before!!! but it's once again completely lacking heat. therion doesn't react much beyond a slight shiver when jiaoqiu does finally pull out, and it's in this moment that, for all of the jokes he's made at jiaoqiu in the past couple of hours, it's hard to miss what those animal instincts left behind? messy, it's still messy, and he is still full, and therion's nose wrinkles, but he shifts a little to not make it worse, and lets jiaoqiu just come back to cuddle with him, a little embarrassed and a little put out, but mostly for the sake of grumbling and nothing else.
it makes a good, if brief, distraction from all the feelings, from the hand resting over his chest - heartbeat, predictably jumping a beat or two - and his fingers curl gently in jiaoqiu's. wordlessly, it gets across, and he likes it that way, okay to sit with it just like that.
though he snorts at jiaoqiu's joke, it's softer than usual, rumbly from his chest, and he has to muffle a yawn into his shoulder as they settle into place. his body's so tired - all of his edges have truly been sanded off. ]
[ therion is very generous to think that jiaoqiu has anything left in him, honestly.
for now, he lets therion settle, because he doesn't want to pull away - he doesn't want to pass up on this. therion is soft and sleepy, and jiaoqiu loves him, he does, he loves every part of him, but this is so rare. he's going to take advantage of it, holding therion warmly against him, stroking his hand with his thumb.
jiaoqiu isn't extraordinarily clingy in their usual day to day, but like this, in their bed, especially after sex, he's cuddly. it means something to him, to have something sweet like this. he's had love before, he's had someone pet his hair after an orgasm, but. the last time that he was with someone, that person hurt him, tore chunks out of him, over and over. metaphorically, but sometimes literally, too.
therion is as far away from hoolay as possible, and jiaoqiu is the complete opposite of darius, and that suits them both well. so. for now, for a good while, jiaoqiu just cuddles therion. holds his hand.
[ thank god he doesn't. that might kill them both.
at any rate - held warm and safe and gentle, with a warm body at his back, the tail over his legs, it's getting really hard to keep his eyes open. because that's what he feels, above all - safe. and safety is priceless, for someone like therion. safe to fall apart in his arms. safe to show a little vulnerability. safe to sleep. he sleeps more soundly than he ever has in his entire life, months out from the nightmare in the last city, curled up next to jiaoqiu. sometimes cuddled up close, sometimes not.
in every indication of that safety and trust, he's already dozing off - his eyelids feel heavy, and his breathing's slowing down, his quickened heartbeat having settled into place safe and sound, fingers still loosely laced with his. when he speaks up, it stirs him awake, but he keeps his eyes closed, and grunts. ] Mnh?
he probably hasn't said this since the first time, or at least, not out loud. he says it in the way he adjusts his recipes for therion, the way he holds open doors and tucks therion's hair behind his ear, but it scares both of them when it's in words, so he's been... careful. but right now, he feels it so brightly that he doesn't want to let it pass, either. silence, for a moment, as he noses at therion, and tells himself, don't chicken out. don't back away.
he holds therion a little more tightly, like he's afraid, and then, soft: ]
[ it's not the first time he's said it - in the comfortable, sleep warm haze of the moment, for once, it doesn't feel as terrifying. it just sort of is a fact of the universe. none of jiaoqiu's gestures go unnoticed, and sometimes that's the problem. sometimes it scares him, makes him skitter just out of reach, but things have gotten better, in the months and months that have passed between them. it's what he needs, those little reminders, those unspoken moments of affection that are something he never even really realized he needed so badly, things that make his heart flutter embarrassingly, starved for the attention but terrified of it all the same.
he's quiet, as if he might have dozed back off, but eventually, he curls his hand where jiaoqiu is resting his on therion's, and after a beat, laces their fingers together and holds, curls around the hand near his chest a little closer like it's the most precious treasure in the world. (because it is.)
he's much the same as jiaoqiu - therion shows it in his gestures. he brings home things he knows jiaoqiu will like like a cat, steals him pretty trinkets and useful tools, hides them in places he knows he'll find them. he gets fussy, worries, tries to take care of him in ways that awkward and sharp and clumsy, gets upset when he's cruel to himself, when he's not taking care of himself. here and there, he's quietly affectionate, picking up jiaoqiu's arm and placing himself underneath it without saying anything or acknowledging it, leaning into his side when they go places together on the train. and maybe most importantly, therion lets jiaoqiu in. into his life. into his bed. into his too big, too vulnerable heart, having built a door into the walls he's spent the past several years constructing into place. it's slow going, sometimes, but it's steady. they really have come a long way.
in this soft, sleepy moment, he mumbles something unintelligible - the words slurred together, but he curls around that hand tight and holds onto it, warm against his chest. ]
[ well, therion doesn't roll off the bed and hide under it, so jiaoqiu takes that as a good sign.
more seriously - there's no tensing or freaking out or anything, and jiaoqiu is content with that. it's even better when therion holds his hold a little more tightly. it means he heard it, and that's what matters.
quietly, jiaoqiu curls a little closer - he hears the mumble, but he doesn't think too hard about it. as much as he'd like to hear the words back, he can live without them - he sees it. he knows it's there, every time therion slides close to him, every time he finds exactly the right ingredients that he needs for something he'd offhandedly mentioned. they take care of each other. and jiaoqiu is determined to do his best. it's nice to have purpose again. it's nice to feel like he's alive again, more than that. he feels it the most when therion clings to him like this, takes the affection without complaint.
for now, therion curls around his hand, and jiaoqiu shifts his tail to use it as a blanket, warming him, stroking his hand with his thumb. he's going to wait for therion to fall asleep before he tries to get up, because he wants to clean him off and clean him up, but there's a good chance he's going to fall asleep too before he can even get to it. ]
[ it doesn't take long - he's asleep again in seconds. it's a light doze, but his breathing evens out, his grip loosening just a little. he doesn't let go, though, holding on like a lifeline. warm, safe, and steady. sleepy. content. emotions therion really only got to feel with jiaoqiu, things he's still learning how to navigate.
which. if jiaoqiu does doze off, there's no problem - but since he falls asleep so quickly, maybe no? and if jiaoqiu does get up, while therion doesn't say anything, when he returns to the room, he'll see therion is looking at him through half lidded eyes, his bad one just barely visible through his messy bangs, head still on the pillow. he's not under a blanket or anything, but he looks comfortable, and he's watching jiaoqiu's movements, much like a cat curled up in a corner keeps track of their person's every move. ]
[ he gets up slowly, like it's going to stop therion from waking up. he makes a tsk sound when he comes back into the room from the bathroom, seeing his eyes half open. just a fussy little noise, gentle. ]
Go back to sleep, little wolf. [ he fake-scolds, coming over to settle back on the bed. he's got a couple of washcloths in hand, wet and warm, and he intends on cleaning up the mess he made out of therion. and the mess therion made out of himself, honestly. his brain is still settled firmly in claiming territory, so this isn't so much because he wants them to be clean so much as he just wants to spoil therion. aftercare.
movements soft, jiaoqiu brings a hand up to stroke through therion's hair, just petting him. ]
Relax.
[ not an order, just a request, as he brings a warm washcloth to start wiping therion down. ]
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and when therion cracks, when he groans like that - it's just loud enough for jiaoqiu's sensitive ears to catch, and he thinks, reward him for it. somewhere in his overheated, racing flood of thoughts, he thinks to do something to keep teaching him that sounds aren't pathetic or stupid, that they're incredibly hot. he doesn't know what and doesn't have the brainpower to think that hard about it, but he tries. therion's arms go a little weak, and jiaoqiu holds him up and breathes, yes, yes, more against his ear, running his tongue along the piercings there. more. it's okay - it's wanted. the way jiaoqiu responds to those sounds breaks his control every time - makes him snap his hips roughly at slightly different angle, like he's trying to find one that will make therion give in.
and then he lets go of jiaoqiu's hair to try and touch himself and the noise jiaoqiu lets out is most definitely a snarl, something low and deep and rumbling in his chest, something meaner than usual. no, that's his. he wants to touch, therion's not allowed, and the best way to make sure that he can't touch himself is - well. do it himself.
so he pulls his hand from where it's resting at his abs and slaps that seeking hand away. claws down therion's stomach to get his fingers around therion's cock instead, stroking from base to tip in time with each thrust. it's just tight enough to give therion room to fuck up into his fist if he wants to, to make a mess. his own rhythm is starting to get frantic, breath shaking in the way that therion knows means he's starting to unravel, pulse throbbing where he's buried, chest heaving against therion's back. ]
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or, you know, maybe it's the moved hand and the growl in his ear. he can't help himself, the hah he lets out almost a laugh, a wild grin sliding across his face, because for every sweet moment, the reminder of what's actually happening hits him again, about how wild and ridiculous he got over this dumb outfit, but the thought fades instantly as jiaoqiu's hand wraps around his cock. this time, he does moan, half surprised out of him and half overwhelmed at the sensation - and the bells jingle violently as he snaps his hips forward into the pressure of his fist. he grabs back onto the covers, higher above his head, white knuckles them and bumps his hips up again, thighs spreading out wider. he can feel jiaoqiu's pulse, th-thump, th-thump, with every thrust forward, and his grip reminds him of fucking him, of having him sprawled out underneath him, and he lets out another noise, but it's not quite - ]
Go - [ therion takes a deep, gasping breath, words dying as jiaoqiu hits so close to what he wants, so close, but not quite, and he turns his head to the side and looks at him over his shoulder, eyes dark, almost desperate, red and flushed, wanting, wanting. ] - slower, fuck, Jiaoqiu --
[ a request you might not expect - maybe even one that could jar the mood, but it'll be worth it, it'll be so worth it. even being able to ask for it is a huge recognition of the safety of that whispered "yes, more" in his ear, of being a participant and not just something to be used and tossed aside. ]
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but - he does hear it, he hears his name, and then slower clicks a second later, and he lets out a pathetic little whine at the notion, but. he does. he drags in a shuddery, wet breath, buries his face between therion's shoulder blades, and slows down. shakes a bit, with it, because therion's legs are spread and the moan he let out was hot, and the way he's clutching at the sheets in front of him makes jiaoqiu feel insane, makes him want to lick and bite and claim, makes him want to fill therion until he's dripping. his pulse is thudding in his ears, and he's twitching inside therion, hopelessly turned on. later he's going to be a little mortified at how far the animal instincts take him, but right now he isn't thinking about anything else.
in this moment, therion asks him, and jiaoqiu is just present enough to know that being able to ask is important. it means something. so he lifts his head from where he'd had it pressed and meets therion's gaze, eyes hazy and mouth open in a pant. he looks punchdrunk, and his lashes flutter, his fangs bite absently at his bottom lip as he sinks slowly into therion, pressed flush against his ass. for a moment, he just stays seated, doesn't move, obedient. he pauses in stroking therion's dick too, slick hand dragging up therion's stomach and chest to pet at him, fingers tracing over shivering, trembling muscles. he's listening. he'll slow down.
when his hips pick up again, it is slower, but no less deep. jiaoqiu finds himself wishing therion had a tail so he could use it for leverage, but he makes do, keeping his hand on therion's torso instead of his cock, wanting to feel his breathing, wanting to feel his sounds as well as hear them. he's just as physically close as before, plastered over therion's back, damp with sweat and nose filled with the scent of them, not looking away from therion as he pumps his hips at a slower, steady pace. ]
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the hands on his body feel twice as sensitive as jiaoqiu's buried deep inside of him like that - his hands, his nails, the wetness of his own precome spread up his stomach and chest, it's a lot, but now that jiaoqiu's not going as frantically, it gives him a second to get his bearings. in that little moment, all that trust makes his heart of all things squirm hard, and for as vulnerable as he feels, it's safe, too. if he thinks about it too much, he'll drown in it. he can lick and bite and claim and fill as much as he wants - embarrassingly, it is in this moment over all of the others today that mine really starts to hit, and he stares at him for a second, overwhelmed.
aaand...mortifying. time to get on with it! now, with jiaoqiu still plastered to his back and a slower pace, therion readjusts his weight. he pushes up higher on his knees, practically bending himself in half, hiking jiaoqiu up a little in the process, which helps jiaoqiu slide another inch deep into him, and that - that's exactly it, that's exactly what he wants. though jiaoqiu's still looking at him, therion cannot return the favor; his eyes nearly roll back in his head when he pulls back and thrusts in at that slow, deep pace, at that new angle, and he turns his face back down towards the covers, forehead resting on the bed, fisting his hands again as another noise melts out of his mouth, a low, needy moan. and then another. he won't last long like this, but the slower they go, the deeper it is, and each full, slow thrust down hits that same spot he likes - he clenches around jiaoqiu, hard, shudders as he comes back out, enough to rattle the bells and coins again, emphasis to each deep, perfect, thrust, emphasis to the rough, needy noises coming out of his mouth.
its another show of that trust - another show of letting go, bit by bit. ]
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this angle makes it hard to lean over him entirely, but he thinks maybe that's okay. he thinks the tradeoff is having therion sprawled under him like this. what a fucking sight it is, therion bent in half, the dancer outfit rumpled and askew. and the noise. it's music to his ears, and said ears press straight up to hear every single bit of it. therion asked him for what he wanted and jiaoqiu is so, so happy to give it to him, to watch him let his walls come down, watch him soak in the pleasure of losing control. panting harshly, jiaoqiu keeps that pace, and leans forward just enough to slide his hands up therion's spine and drag his claws down therion's back, leaving red lines behind. it's almost funny to do, because even when jiaoqiu is on top he manages to find a way to scratch the shit out of therion. somewhere in there, he tangles his fingers into the fabric of the top, pulling it taut, rubbing it between his fingers, listening to the gold coins rattle each time he fucks into him.
the animal instinct sticks at the forefront of his mind. he watches therion press his face into the mattress and moan like he needs this, and jiaoqiu desperately wants to bite him, his mouth almost watering with it. each perfect, hot clench around his cock makes him feel like he's on fire; the slower pace means that he feels every inch. he's damp with sweat and his muscles are screaming at him, but all of that is just fuel - he trembles with each thrust, hands finally coming back to rest on therion's hips, kneading at his ass, absently spreading him further and watching therion's muscles flex and relax when he slides in to the hilt.
there's no way he can last like this, he was already on the edge.
it's just a couple of moments of this pace - he does his very best to not speed up, and on one of therion's needy moans, his whole body tenses. desperately, he breathes out: ] A-ah, Therion --
[ and his hips judder violently, his hands holding therion's hips so tightly he will leave bruises. head falling back, he spills inside therion, hot, wet pulses, gasping. his vision blurs, whites out, the pleasure washing over him and nearly wiping him out.
for just a second, he stays there, shaking, and then - he starts moving again, picking up that same slow, deep pace, still hard enough to hit that spot inside therion as best he can with each push. the way is slick, helped by his release, and the sound is obscene; jiaoqiu moans, low and guttural, overwhelmed, but he doesn't quit. he just curls over therion and grabs therion by the thighs, pulling him back onto his cock with an attempt to keep his gasps soft so he can hear therion lose it. ]
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and it's not the first time, but god, it's easy to forget - jiaoqiu releases, the sensation hot and filling, and his mouth falls open, eyes going wide before they melt closed again, hips tilting upwards a little further, thighs trembling. he pulls his legs closer again, squeezing tight around jiaoqiu as he releases him, milking out every drop, and the heat in his stomach, his groin, almost agonizingly close to getting off. in the past, this would be it -- he'd get himself off out of view, maybe a rough, dry couple tugs depending on how generous darius was feeling, and for a brief second, he's almost expecting it when he slows down and trembles, and half dazed, he starts trying to put himself together again, find his composure, make some shitty commentary and --
well, and then he moves again. the noise that comes out of therion is almost a croon when he slams back down, half startled out of his mouth, grabbing onto the sheets for dear fucking life. it's wet and messy, leaking around jiaoqiu when he plunges back into him, down the insides of his thighs, and he feels so hypersensitive to that that even that sensation makes him jerk, desperately, the coins erratically jingling out of rhythm, now. close, he's so fucking close, basically untouched, and as he starts to push himself half up on his elbows to make sure he gets closer, make sure he doesn't pull too far away, make sure he gets off, jiaoqiu grabs onto his thighs, all fingertips and bruises and claws, slamming him back down to the base of his cock, and then noise therion makes is obscene. he throws one of his legs over the back of jiaoqiu's, and fucks himself in earnest back - once, deep enough that he sees starts, twice, and with jiaoqiu having already released in him and buried deep to the hilt, therion makes a strangled noise like a yelp that dissolves into a series of high, desperate moans as all that tension finally snaps, and his orgasm hits him, hard.
it makes a terrible mess - splattering the covers, the front of the costume, the belt, and therion's hips rock back and forth onto jiaoqiu, taking him faster again, desperately chasing out the friction and until he's spent out, and he just stays like that, trembling from head to toe, breathing hard. his forehead's still buried in the covers, hands still fisted in the sheets, and he just needs a minute to be there and bring himself properly back to earth. ]
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watching therion come - watching him ruin his costume, the damn thing that started all of this in the first place - is enough to make jiaoqiu come again.
it's just an extension of the first one - therion tightens so much around him and moans, and it floods jiaoqiu's senses. he's already wildly oversensitive as is, and it's not exactly another orgasm as it is just - therion comes, and jiaoqiu chokes on a moan, pulsing, spilling just a little bit more inside him. it's an awful, sticky mess, but he'd be lying if it doesn't appeal very, very much to his foxian brain, the feeling of really filling therion and leaking out of him. he's dizzy with it.
and then they're both absolutely spent, shaking and exhausted.
it's okay, he needs a minute too, panting desperately for air as he slumps over therion, pressing his face against therion's neck and hiding it there. he doesn't pull out, and he doesn't let go - he just hugs therion from behind, hooking one arm loosely across therion's chest and clinging to his shoulder, the other resting against therion's stomach, palms warm on his skin. his ears flick every couple of seconds, fluttery, because he's absolutely lost in post-orgasm bliss, breathing therion in, rubbing the mess into his skin. absolutely filthy. ]
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[ partially in disbelief, partially in how he twitches buried deep in therion and another pulse of come is so hot that it makes him shudder through his orgasm again. it feels like he could taste it on the back of his tongue, there's so much, and that phantom sensation is enough to wipe out the rest of his thoughts as he temporarily blanks out, his hips lowering, though really only enough to make it easier for jiaoqiu to drape over him, trembling through each aftershock.
slowly, eventually, his eyes blink open. one terrible and one functioning, vision hazy, dizzy, and he comes back to semi-reality to jiaoqiu's hands all over him, rubbing... rubbing the mess in. it's not the first time he's done something similar, and honestly, he's still so dazed he doesn't even care, floating in the afterglow as all the endorphins melt through his body. so. therion just lets him do this - he is never the one to complain about a mess, that's jiaoqiu - lets him cling, and eventually, turns his head enough to barely bump it against jiaoqiu's where he's bowed over him, to let him know he's like, alive.
for once in his life, he does not have a damn shitty thing to say? he's not sure he can put his brain together enough to make words. ]
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it takes him a second to even reply when therion bumps at him. he like, visibly reboots, making a soft noise that sounds almost like purring as he noses at therion's hair. he's so, so content. it's been a while since all of his body has been this relaxed. definition of fucked out, here.
they are. going to have to do so much laundry. good lord. but he's not thinking about that so much right now. instead, messily, he searches for therion's mouth so he can kiss him. lazily, and like, it's barely a kiss, it's kind of just because he's feeling wildly affectionate. but he tries!
after a moment, he rumbles, low and deep in his chest, and mumbles a garbled mess of something that probably was meant to be words. his tail eases over therion's leg, still possessive because he's in full lizard mode. ]
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instead, he just swears again, a low "fuck", and shakes his head. what the fuck just happened. his entire body feels heavy, but the weighted blanket of jiaoqiu on his back is more of a blessing than it is a curse, and the benefit of him being equally fucked out is that he, exhausted, also thinks cuddling sounds good, and therion mutters: ] At least let me lay down, fluff.
[ god. he can tell jiaoqiu's still not fully there - he gets like this when they fuck sometimes, though today has been an especially unique experience for a variety of reasons - but hopefully with that he can ease down. he doesn't think jiaoqiu's going to want to pull out, and frankly, he can stay there - he moves slowly if he wants to stay attached, the jingles of the coins and bells that aren't currently sticking to his skin now silent as therion is conscious of his own movement, no longer fucked into forgetting about it. ]
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another grumbly sound, but he seems to at least be a little more cognizant. a beat. he sighs, heavily, and then helps therion shift so that they can lay down. therion's right, though, he doesn't really want to pull out just yet, so he shifts them so that therion isn't crunched up on his knees, settling on their sides for now. this means he can spoon therion happily, his back to jiaoqiu's front, wrapping his arms around him and getting his hand under that stupid dancer top. in an inspired bratty movement that he's still capable of even when he's zoned out, he rattles the bells. hehe. make noise.
and then, sleepily, stroking his fingers up and down therion's front: ]
You're amazing. [ sincerely... it is a struggle to not just dazedly be like, i love you after all that, because he thinks therion might roll off the bed if he did.
he yawns, muffling it against therion's shoulder. ]
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whatever. the back of his neck warms up under his sweaty hair - it gets worse, when jiaoqiu punch drunk compliments him right in his ear, and he snorts and rolls his eyes. ]
Oh, you can form sentences. [ like he's any better? he's not. his words are a little slurred - not only did he canvas and work half the day, but he's a normal person and not a foxian, and coming twice, the second having had his insides thoroughly scrambled, is pretty tiring. jiaoqiu isn't the only one who's tired. his voice is low and rumbly, fucked out and used, and he settles heavily here, held close, heart pounding hard underneath jiaoqiu's hand.
blearily, therion takes a minute to examine himself. he can't see much of what he's wearing from this angle, but the gauzy silky bits in the back and the sheer sleeves both are sticking to him from the sweat, and he has a feeling the rest of this is going to be sticky later, too. when he can move his limbs again, he's changing out of it. when he can move his limbs again. which may be never.
... though... eventually, there's a huff of something, a rumbled, amused chuckle. ] Costumes, huh.
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for now, he presses soft kisses against therion's neck, where he's tucked close. strokes over his chest, like he can make his heartbeat settle down. it's okay. he doesn't need to be embarrassed or freaked out. it's all good. he's not going to turn it into something to dangle over therion's head, he's not going to make fun of him or taunt him.
the comment makes him huff, though. ]
... Just this one. [ a little ear flick. he's absolutely too three-orgasmed to be embarrassed. ] You shouldn't be surprised I find you attractive.
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he keeps that to himself, though, and lets himself float a little longer in the hazy post-orgasm bliss, closing his eyes. he can feel the wind from jiaoqiu's ear flicking. ]
No. [ yeah, of course that's not surprising. therion knows he's hot shit so he just agrees with that immediately. ] Just saying... wouldn't have said you were this into this yesterday, either.
[ his attempts at sass are again, extremely blunted. it sounds like there might be a smile on his face. ]
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Your waist was... [ he starts, like he's trying to figure out how to describe why he's into it. a beat. ] I wanted to get my hands around it.
[ he punctuates this by sliding his hand down to rest on therion's side, the slight curve where his hip slopes. ]
I don't see you like that often. Your clothes are oversized. It hides you. [ not that that's a bad thing, it's just kind of like, oh! wow! he's got a a teeny waist and jiaoqiu has a lot of self control except for when it comes to wanting to fuck his tiny thief stupid, apparently. another little yawn. ]
I imagine there are things that drive you to base instinct as well.
[ he can't... think of anything about himself that would inspire that, because his self esteem is very poor, but hey. ]
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but, well. with jiaoqiu... mmf. he starts to say something else, and then reverts to the sarcasm instead, muttering: ] I'm not the one with animal instincts.
[ there probably is something that can get therion riled up. he's slammed jiaoqiu into a wall once or twice over it, jumped him before he got a word out and fucked him silly. embarrassingly, the things that have gotten him the most riled have often been things that were softer in nature? moments where jiaoqiu proved therion's trust was well placed were the things that made him launch himself at him like a feral creature, which is both embarrassing and not something he wants to admit out loud no matter how comfortable he is, how floaty he feels.
after a moment of quiet, his eyes sliding shut, he thinks a little longer, and he says: ]
... You're the only one who gets to. [ it's a little bit of a non sequitir, a little stilted. ] See me that way. In general.
[ not just with the fucky costume, either - he gets a little embarrassed after he says it, and after a beat, he sets his hand gently on top of his, and leaves it there. ]
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You like it. [ he says, after a moment, tail wagging slightly behind him. another beat, and then very carefully he will pull out of therion because it's starting to get uncomfortable, but he does not let therion go anywhere. he likes it here and he will be enjoying his time getting to cuddle therion without therion complaining about it for thirty minutes.
and then he tells jiaoqiu that much, and - it's silly. he shouldn't get emotional about it, and, well, he doesn't, not really, not overly so. he does press a kiss to therion's cheek when he says so - and his heart clenches in his chest at the idea of being the only person therion lets see him like that. he knows the amount of trust and love that lives in that statement, and he keeps it close. holds onto it. another way to keep him grounded, here.
it's been months since he's gone under. it's wild.
jiaoqiu links their fingers loosely. ]
Well, that's good. [ he murmurs, lightly. ] Or I'd have to challenge someone to a duel, and we both know how that'd end.
[ he's joking, but the way he takes therion's hand and slides them up to rest over his chest, still clasped together - he hopes that gets across that he understands. ]
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[ the noise comes out of his mouth as more of complaint than anything else, eyes screwing shut because not only is he still oversensitive, but it's a little cold and very wet, and he grumbles, ] Don't lose it again.
[ considering!!! before!!! but it's once again completely lacking heat. therion doesn't react much beyond a slight shiver when jiaoqiu does finally pull out, and it's in this moment that, for all of the jokes he's made at jiaoqiu in the past couple of hours, it's hard to miss what those animal instincts left behind? messy, it's still messy, and he is still full, and therion's nose wrinkles, but he shifts a little to not make it worse, and lets jiaoqiu just come back to cuddle with him, a little embarrassed and a little put out, but mostly for the sake of grumbling and nothing else.
it makes a good, if brief, distraction from all the feelings, from the hand resting over his chest - heartbeat, predictably jumping a beat or two - and his fingers curl gently in jiaoqiu's. wordlessly, it gets across, and he likes it that way, okay to sit with it just like that.
though he snorts at jiaoqiu's joke, it's softer than usual, rumbly from his chest, and he has to muffle a yawn into his shoulder as they settle into place. his body's so tired - all of his edges have truly been sanded off. ]
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for now, he lets therion settle, because he doesn't want to pull away - he doesn't want to pass up on this. therion is soft and sleepy, and jiaoqiu loves him, he does, he loves every part of him, but this is so rare. he's going to take advantage of it, holding therion warmly against him, stroking his hand with his thumb.
jiaoqiu isn't extraordinarily clingy in their usual day to day, but like this, in their bed, especially after sex, he's cuddly. it means something to him, to have something sweet like this. he's had love before, he's had someone pet his hair after an orgasm, but. the last time that he was with someone, that person hurt him, tore chunks out of him, over and over. metaphorically, but sometimes literally, too.
therion is as far away from hoolay as possible, and jiaoqiu is the complete opposite of darius, and that suits them both well. so. for now, for a good while, jiaoqiu just cuddles therion. holds his hand.
and after that while, he murmurs: ] Therion.
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at any rate - held warm and safe and gentle, with a warm body at his back, the tail over his legs, it's getting really hard to keep his eyes open. because that's what he feels, above all - safe. and safety is priceless, for someone like therion. safe to fall apart in his arms. safe to show a little vulnerability. safe to sleep. he sleeps more soundly than he ever has in his entire life, months out from the nightmare in the last city, curled up next to jiaoqiu. sometimes cuddled up close, sometimes not.
in every indication of that safety and trust, he's already dozing off - his eyelids feel heavy, and his breathing's slowing down, his quickened heartbeat having settled into place safe and sound, fingers still loosely laced with his. when he speaks up, it stirs him awake, but he keeps his eyes closed, and grunts. ] Mnh?
[ yes. what is it. ]
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he probably hasn't said this since the first time, or at least, not out loud. he says it in the way he adjusts his recipes for therion, the way he holds open doors and tucks therion's hair behind his ear, but it scares both of them when it's in words, so he's been... careful. but right now, he feels it so brightly that he doesn't want to let it pass, either. silence, for a moment, as he noses at therion, and tells himself, don't chicken out. don't back away.
he holds therion a little more tightly, like he's afraid, and then, soft: ]
I love you. [ ... ] Sorry to wake you.
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he's quiet, as if he might have dozed back off, but eventually, he curls his hand where jiaoqiu is resting his on therion's, and after a beat, laces their fingers together and holds, curls around the hand near his chest a little closer like it's the most precious treasure in the world. (because it is.)
he's much the same as jiaoqiu - therion shows it in his gestures. he brings home things he knows jiaoqiu will like like a cat, steals him pretty trinkets and useful tools, hides them in places he knows he'll find them. he gets fussy, worries, tries to take care of him in ways that awkward and sharp and clumsy, gets upset when he's cruel to himself, when he's not taking care of himself. here and there, he's quietly affectionate, picking up jiaoqiu's arm and placing himself underneath it without saying anything or acknowledging it, leaning into his side when they go places together on the train. and maybe most importantly, therion lets jiaoqiu in. into his life. into his bed. into his too big, too vulnerable heart, having built a door into the walls he's spent the past several years constructing into place. it's slow going, sometimes, but it's steady. they really have come a long way.
in this soft, sleepy moment, he mumbles something unintelligible - the words slurred together, but he curls around that hand tight and holds onto it, warm against his chest. ]
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more seriously - there's no tensing or freaking out or anything, and jiaoqiu is content with that. it's even better when therion holds his hold a little more tightly. it means he heard it, and that's what matters.
quietly, jiaoqiu curls a little closer - he hears the mumble, but he doesn't think too hard about it. as much as he'd like to hear the words back, he can live without them - he sees it. he knows it's there, every time therion slides close to him, every time he finds exactly the right ingredients that he needs for something he'd offhandedly mentioned. they take care of each other. and jiaoqiu is determined to do his best. it's nice to have purpose again. it's nice to feel like he's alive again, more than that. he feels it the most when therion clings to him like this, takes the affection without complaint.
for now, therion curls around his hand, and jiaoqiu shifts his tail to use it as a blanket, warming him, stroking his hand with his thumb. he's going to wait for therion to fall asleep before he tries to get up, because he wants to clean him off and clean him up, but there's a good chance he's going to fall asleep too before he can even get to it. ]
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which. if jiaoqiu does doze off, there's no problem - but since he falls asleep so quickly, maybe no? and if jiaoqiu does get up, while therion doesn't say anything, when he returns to the room, he'll see therion is looking at him through half lidded eyes, his bad one just barely visible through his messy bangs, head still on the pillow. he's not under a blanket or anything, but he looks comfortable, and he's watching jiaoqiu's movements, much like a cat curled up in a corner keeps track of their person's every move. ]
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Go back to sleep, little wolf. [ he fake-scolds, coming over to settle back on the bed. he's got a couple of washcloths in hand, wet and warm, and he intends on cleaning up the mess he made out of therion. and the mess therion made out of himself, honestly. his brain is still settled firmly in claiming territory, so this isn't so much because he wants them to be clean so much as he just wants to spoil therion. aftercare.
movements soft, jiaoqiu brings a hand up to stroke through therion's hair, just petting him. ]
Relax.
[ not an order, just a request, as he brings a warm washcloth to start wiping therion down. ]
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