people don't, like. they just don't say things like this to her. some of the travelers are very good about this - hikari and partitio both have given her genuinely kind affirmations in the past, but it still makes her want to hide or deflect or just. yell, internally. this isn't even the worst she's heard, even! it's just that it's so earnest and she's not used to conversations where she doesn't have to be 100% on her guard at all times.
silence, for a moment, and then she pulls her hand away from his ears because it's not distracting him enough. this is now a punishment he can have pets when she's not pouting]
Yes, I know that you'd keep it to yourself. [she says finally, picking up the drink again. fidgety.] I don't like to tell people anything about myself, especially not how I feel. They'll use it against me. They always have.
[things the drink just has her say that it'd be like pulling teeth to get out of her otherwise for 500]
[ oh... this makes him frown, immediately. (the pets or the statement ? yes)
when throné pulls her hand away, he does reach up to kind of fix his fluff, though it does not work and he gives up on it immediately. his ears droop a little, and he frowns, scooting a little closer to her so no one can overhear their conversation. ]
... I'm sorry that people have used something like that against you. [ he can't even imagine that - then again, rondo wears his heart on his sleeve in every way possible. for better or for worse. ] Even the positive things... people can be awfully cruel, sometimes.
[ from what little he has gleaned about throné, it breaks his heart to hear it. he frowns a little further, looking down at his cup that he has now also abandoned. ]
I don't know that it helps, but... it makes me happy to hear about you. [ there's a beat - and then his ears perk! and he scoots a little closer. ] And if it makes you very uncomfortable, then perhaps I will just - not say anything! Until it passes. It shouldn't take too long, right? And then you wouldn't have to say anything you don't want to.
[she's... embarrassed? a little. when he scoots closer to her, she shifts, instinctively closing herself off, pulling her arms and legs in and making herself a bit smaller. it's a learned response to anybody getting close enough, not just him, and she has to convince herself to ease up. un-tense, not hug her arm around her waist as tightly as she's got it.
he's not a danger to her. she knows that. he's safe.]
You're ridiculous. [she says, and it'd be meaner or scarier if she wasn't so obviously pouting. a beat.] ... You're so kind. Someone is going to hurt you because of it, with all those stars in your eyes. I wish I could be like that.
[a
pause. puts her entire hand over her face with a groan.]
I don't think that it cares if you're silent or not. [she grits out.]
[ oh... throné thinks he's kind? the ridiculous comment is more normal, and he's touched, at first, visibly, actually touched, but as she continues...
well. rondo's smile softens a little - there's something unmistakably sad to it, and he decides not to address it when she keeps talking, instead just letting out a little laugh and a sympathetic, ] Oh, no.
[ poor throné. he lifts his hand to the bar to get a water sent down their way, then takes it and sets it gently in front of her when she's got her face in her hands. ]
I think you're very kind, Throné. [ maybe it makes it worse if he addresses it. should he address it. would solutions be better. ] Mm... well, maybe it's about what you think about? What are you thinking about? Maybe you can blurt out things that aren't too much that way...?
[screams!!! no!!! she isn't kind!!! she's an awful, selfish person and everybody should think that too!!!
she doesn't say anything about that part, swallowing it down roughly. she doesn't want to get into her self-esteem, because she isn't even really all that aware of it herself, and also because she doesn't like it when he looks sad. genuinely sad, not bullied.
which is why he catches her off guard with that question, even as she's reaching for the water:]
I'm thinking about how much I dislike making you look sad. [lord]
[ oh. see, this is why he thinks you're kind. because you are kind.
that's the first thing that crosses rondo's mind - he lifts his hands up for a moment, then presses them to his own face. what a genuine, sweet thing to say, even if she didn't mean to say it out loud, and rondo bites his lip to keep from making a bit deal about it, instead squishing his own cheeks gently. ]
Sad - I'm not sad. [ well. maybe it's obvious. ] You didn't do anything, I was just - you just reminded me of something, that's all. [ with a smile, bright: ] So, that's nothing to worry too much about!
[ and then the smile softens a little further. ] ... It's really sweet of you to say that, though. [ a beat. ] Even though you didn't want to say it - I'm not doing very well at being distracting.
[she's caught between like, being amused at him putting his hands on his face like he can feel if he's sad or not, and being mortified. she has her hand up, fingers massaging at the bridge of her nose, expression pinched, but. she's not mad at him! she is just exasperated with drinks like these, the ones that strip you of all privacy.]
... You do fine. [she says, after a minute, with a short sigh.] You're the one I look forward to talking to the most when things are difficult.
[she sounds resigned when she says, having given up.]
Don't say that I'm sweet. I'm not. You'll be disappointed.
[ ah. well. the resigned tone makes him look sympathetic, but he looks downright touched when she says that about talking to him, and then she immediately... ]
... Throné, you can't think saying things like that and then saying I'll be disappointed can exist in the same sphere, can you...?
[ these two statements cannot coexist ]
You're proving yourself wrong. [ a beat. ] Besides, it'd be really hard to disappoint me. I'm not unrealistic - [ and the bar is so unbelievably low, because the last person who turned out to be what they weren't turned his entire life and quite nearly all of orsterra on its head ] - and... you wouldn't let me believe a lie when it comes to that kind of thing, anyway.
it's not that she doesn't think he thinks that. there are a lot of very good people that she's known over her life that thought highly of her when they didn't know the extent of the worst of her. she wants to be good, she wants to be worth knowing, but she's tainted. she's had grave dirt embedded in her soul since she was born, and she knows that for sure, these days.]
Maybe I'm waiting for you to drop your guard so I can stab you in the back. [she says dryly. that's not the drink, sometimes you aren't sure what to say in response to someone so you're just an asshole instead.]
[ well. confidently, and immediately, with a smile: ]
You aren't.
[ because he knows what betrayal looks like. he knows it so intimately that he dreams about it at night. he knows it sneaks up on you, he knows sometimes you can know someone and not really know them at all.
but throné's not like that, and he knows it. she's trusting him right now, with this conversation, and he can tell that's hard for her, and yet. here they are. instead of being convinced by her putting up a spike, he'll just hold that trust tenderly in his hands.
he reaches for the lemon drink after a moment. can't beat em, join em. ]
[don't drink the horrible secrets drink!! she doesn't want him to suffer through it either, which is why she reaches and puts a hand on top of his. there's no hesitation there, funnily enough.]
... You don't have to. [she glances at him, and - at his puppy ears, and those make her lips twitch at the corners, she can't help it.]
[ solidarity!!!! the ears perk a little - he peeks up at her from under his bangs, and smiles at her, all warm and genuine, hand curling a little underneath hers. ]
Unless you want to drink the milk, but if you do that, I'm definitely drinking this one.
[not the perky ears, she looks like she is a touch flustered in a huffy way at the ears and genuine smile combination. rude.]
... The worst that happens is I grow ears, I suppose. [she glances at the milk drink.] Fine. We trade.
[fair is fair! she thinks that the ears are not as embarrassing as blurting all your thoughts out, but it's still something, and she works in scales. so. before he can say anything, she reaches over and takes a drink of the milk.
and a pair of kitty ears appear on her head, the same color as her hair.]
[ rondo drinks the drink! the flavor is nice - it's sweet and kind of refreshing, honestly? it's fine for his ye olde palate, and he smacks his lips a little thoughtfully.
when he looks up, he stops, though, and then just lights up. ]
- Oh! Throné, you're a cat! How cute....!
[ is this a drink related honest thought or is this an actual honest thought out of his mouth. hard to say ]
[ he's excited!!!!! the ears... this is so cute.... maybe this milk drink isn't that bad. ]
It suits you! You're very catlike. [ again. it is very hard to tell if rondo's actually impacted by this lemon drink or if he's just like this. he leans forward a little curiously to peer at the ears more - then, seems to remember something and digs around in his pocket for the phone he was issued! he's not great with this thing, honestly, his pictures are usually blurry, but he pulls it out and fiddles with it until he can turn the selfie screen on, then turns it towards her so she can see herself. ]
At least there's not a tail, right? Haha. That'd be embarrassing.
[she gives him a bemused look at that first part, like she's not sure if that's a compliment. she's taking it as one because rondo is rondo, at least.]
It would be embarrassing. [she agrees, giving him a little half-smile. it'd be embarrassing for you, is what that expression is saying. but then he turns the camera on, and shows her - and she looks, head tilting.
when she spots the ears, they twitch.]
... They remind me of Ochette. [she says, after a moment. in a sort of like... not sad, but weh, i miss my friends, way.]
[ ochette, ochette... ah!! his ears perk up immediately in recognition as he remembers the name. ]
That's one of the people that you travel with. She's... a hunter, right? I think that's right. Does she really like cats? [ there's a pause, and then just completely offhandedly, as he's taking another sip of his drink: ] Ah, wow, your smile is pretty.
[ he
promptly chokes on said drink and starts to turn red, immediately, coughing and waving his hand to try and wave it off like no, no, he's cool ]
[help he chokes and she actually startles, her ears sticking straight up. partially because he's coughing but also because your smile is pretty makes her heart do like six backflips in a row.
has anybody told her that in a genuine way before? she's not sure.
she also has to recover from this, the tops of her cheeks pink - opens her mouth and then shuts it, and then opens it again, and shuts it and clears her throat.]
... She is a hunter. [she says valiantly, and like, she'd normally try to tease him about that, but. it's going to take her a second.] She's a beastling. So it isn't so much that she likes cats as much as she's... partially one.
[ help. embarrassing. he coughs, clearing his throat of the burn of alcohol and lemon (not that refreshing when you're choking on it actually) and looks like, almost desperately relieved when she carries on the conversation, immediately switching gears and nodding along enthusiastically to this description.
he's still very red in the face but once he clears his throat he's doing better. right! right. ]
... oh, I see... I've, um never met a beastling before, I don't think they live in Orsterra. [ they do not. rondo is imagining a cait at this time. there's that one weird talking cait in the nameless village the ringbearer chosen talks about sometimes? but you know what he's so mortified by this drink that he just accepts what throné tells him as reality which is good. it is. ]
I don't believe you're referring to the beastlings here, are you...
[ ah. yes it is back to rondo being bullied time. he ducks his head a little, turning pinker with this rueful comment, especially when throné leans into his space? but after a moment... ]
... Of course I do. [ duh? duh. ] It's - I shouldn't just say that out loud, but it is not the first time I've thought it, either.
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people don't, like. they just don't say things like this to her. some of the travelers are very good about this - hikari and partitio both have given her genuinely kind affirmations in the past, but it still makes her want to hide or deflect or just. yell, internally. this isn't even the worst she's heard, even! it's just that it's so earnest and she's not used to conversations where she doesn't have to be 100% on her guard at all times.
silence, for a moment, and then she pulls her hand away from his ears because it's not distracting him enough. this is now a punishment he can have pets when she's not pouting]
Yes, I know that you'd keep it to yourself. [she says finally, picking up the drink again. fidgety.] I don't like to tell people anything about myself, especially not how I feel. They'll use it against me. They always have.
[things the drink just has her say that it'd be like pulling teeth to get out of her otherwise for 500]
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when throné pulls her hand away, he does reach up to kind of fix his fluff, though it does not work and he gives up on it immediately. his ears droop a little, and he frowns, scooting a little closer to her so no one can overhear their conversation. ]
... I'm sorry that people have used something like that against you. [ he can't even imagine that - then again, rondo wears his heart on his sleeve in every way possible. for better or for worse. ] Even the positive things... people can be awfully cruel, sometimes.
[ from what little he has gleaned about throné, it breaks his heart to hear it. he frowns a little further, looking down at his cup that he has now also abandoned. ]
I don't know that it helps, but... it makes me happy to hear about you. [ there's a beat - and then his ears perk! and he scoots a little closer. ] And if it makes you very uncomfortable, then perhaps I will just - not say anything! Until it passes. It shouldn't take too long, right? And then you wouldn't have to say anything you don't want to.
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he's not a danger to her. she knows that. he's safe.]
You're ridiculous. [she says, and it'd be meaner or scarier if she wasn't so obviously pouting. a beat.] ... You're so kind. Someone is going to hurt you because of it, with all those stars in your eyes. I wish I could be like that.
[a
pause. puts her entire hand over her face with a groan.]
I don't think that it cares if you're silent or not. [she grits out.]
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well. rondo's smile softens a little - there's something unmistakably sad to it, and he decides not to address it when she keeps talking, instead just letting out a little laugh and a sympathetic, ] Oh, no.
[ poor throné. he lifts his hand to the bar to get a water sent down their way, then takes it and sets it gently in front of her when she's got her face in her hands. ]
I think you're very kind, Throné. [ maybe it makes it worse if he addresses it. should he address it. would solutions be better. ] Mm... well, maybe it's about what you think about? What are you thinking about? Maybe you can blurt out things that aren't too much that way...?
[ everything is going to be too much ]
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she doesn't say anything about that part, swallowing it down roughly. she doesn't want to get into her self-esteem, because she isn't even really all that aware of it herself, and also because she doesn't like it when he looks sad. genuinely sad, not bullied.
which is why he catches her off guard with that question, even as she's reaching for the water:]
I'm thinking about how much I dislike making you look sad. [lord]
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that's the first thing that crosses rondo's mind - he lifts his hands up for a moment, then presses them to his own face. what a genuine, sweet thing to say, even if she didn't mean to say it out loud, and rondo bites his lip to keep from making a bit deal about it, instead squishing his own cheeks gently. ]
Sad - I'm not sad. [ well. maybe it's obvious. ] You didn't do anything, I was just - you just reminded me of something, that's all. [ with a smile, bright: ] So, that's nothing to worry too much about!
[ and then the smile softens a little further. ] ... It's really sweet of you to say that, though. [ a beat. ] Even though you didn't want to say it - I'm not doing very well at being distracting.
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... You do fine. [she says, after a minute, with a short sigh.] You're the one I look forward to talking to the most when things are difficult.
[she sounds resigned when she says, having given up.]
Don't say that I'm sweet. I'm not. You'll be disappointed.
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... Throné, you can't think saying things like that and then saying I'll be disappointed can exist in the same sphere, can you...?
[ these two statements cannot coexist ]
You're proving yourself wrong. [ a beat. ] Besides, it'd be really hard to disappoint me. I'm not unrealistic - [ and the bar is so unbelievably low, because the last person who turned out to be what they weren't turned his entire life and quite nearly all of orsterra on its head ] - and... you wouldn't let me believe a lie when it comes to that kind of thing, anyway.
no subject
it's not that she doesn't think he thinks that. there are a lot of very good people that she's known over her life that thought highly of her when they didn't know the extent of the worst of her. she wants to be good, she wants to be worth knowing, but she's tainted. she's had grave dirt embedded in her soul since she was born, and she knows that for sure, these days.]
Maybe I'm waiting for you to drop your guard so I can stab you in the back. [she says dryly. that's not the drink, sometimes you aren't sure what to say in response to someone so you're just an asshole instead.]
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You aren't.
[ because he knows what betrayal looks like. he knows it so intimately that he dreams about it at night. he knows it sneaks up on you, he knows sometimes you can know someone and not really know them at all.
but throné's not like that, and he knows it. she's trusting him right now, with this conversation, and he can tell that's hard for her, and yet. here they are. instead of being convinced by her putting up a spike, he'll just hold that trust tenderly in his hands.
he reaches for the lemon drink after a moment. can't beat em, join em. ]
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[don't drink the horrible secrets drink!! she doesn't want him to suffer through it either, which is why she reaches and puts a hand on top of his. there's no hesitation there, funnily enough.]
... You don't have to. [she glances at him, and - at his puppy ears, and those make her lips twitch at the corners, she can't help it.]
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[ solidarity!!!! the ears perk a little - he peeks up at her from under his bangs, and smiles at her, all warm and genuine, hand curling a little underneath hers. ]
Unless you want to drink the milk, but if you do that, I'm definitely drinking this one.
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... The worst that happens is I grow ears, I suppose. [she glances at the milk drink.] Fine. We trade.
[fair is fair! she thinks that the ears are not as embarrassing as blurting all your thoughts out, but it's still something, and she works in scales. so. before he can say anything, she reaches over and takes a drink of the milk.
and a pair of kitty ears appear on her head, the same color as her hair.]
no subject
when he looks up, he stops, though, and then just lights up. ]
- Oh! Throné, you're a cat! How cute....!
[ is this a drink related honest thought or is this an actual honest thought out of his mouth. hard to say ]
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he looks very excited, which means one of her ears flick, and then - both press back, just a bit, cautious.]
... A cat. [she repeats, brow furrowing as she brings her hand up to touch her ears.] I see. I wasn't expecting...
[well, maybe she's not totally surprised, but. it is very weird to have real cat ears.]
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It suits you! You're very catlike. [ again. it is very hard to tell if rondo's actually impacted by this lemon drink or if he's just like this. he leans forward a little curiously to peer at the ears more - then, seems to remember something and digs around in his pocket for the phone he was issued! he's not great with this thing, honestly, his pictures are usually blurry, but he pulls it out and fiddles with it until he can turn the selfie screen on, then turns it towards her so she can see herself. ]
At least there's not a tail, right? Haha. That'd be embarrassing.
[ at least he's a little self aware ]
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It would be embarrassing. [she agrees, giving him a little half-smile. it'd be embarrassing for you, is what that expression is saying. but then he turns the camera on, and shows her - and she looks, head tilting.
when she spots the ears, they twitch.]
... They remind me of Ochette. [she says, after a moment. in a sort of like... not sad, but weh, i miss my friends, way.]
no subject
That's one of the people that you travel with. She's... a hunter, right? I think that's right. Does she really like cats? [ there's a pause, and then just completely offhandedly, as he's taking another sip of his drink: ] Ah, wow, your smile is pretty.
[ he
promptly chokes on said drink and starts to turn red, immediately, coughing and waving his hand to try and wave it off like no, no, he's cool ]
....anyway! Your friend!
no subject
has anybody told her that in a genuine way before? she's not sure.
she also has to recover from this, the tops of her cheeks pink - opens her mouth and then shuts it, and then opens it again, and shuts it and clears her throat.]
... She is a hunter. [she says valiantly, and like, she'd normally try to tease him about that, but. it's going to take her a second.] She's a beastling. So it isn't so much that she likes cats as much as she's... partially one.
no subject
he's still very red in the face but once he clears his throat he's doing better. right! right. ]
... oh, I see... I've, um never met a beastling before, I don't think they live in Orsterra. [ they do not. rondo is imagining a cait at this time. there's that one weird talking cait in the nameless village the ringbearer chosen talks about sometimes? but you know what he's so mortified by this drink that he just accepts what throné tells him as reality which is good. it is. ]
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she hums in response to what he says, watching him for a second, and then carefully leans forward.]
Probably not. There are a few differences between our worlds. [...] Do you mean that?
[that she has a pretty smile. it's mostly teasing! if she embarrasses him more than she is embarrassed she wins, actually?
but if he's paying attention there's a little bit of genuineness underneath it.]
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[ ah. yes it is back to rondo being bullied time. he ducks his head a little, turning pinker with this rueful comment, especially when throné leans into his space? but after a moment... ]
... Of course I do. [ duh? duh. ] It's - I shouldn't just say that out loud, but it is not the first time I've thought it, either.
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You're handsome. It's very endearing when you blush. [oh that's not what she meant to say fuck HER OWN DRINK IS STILL ACTIVE
her ears just. press back. hm.]
... Hm.
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a long pause. ]
.... You think I'm handsome....?
[ he sounds so genuinely touched. and surprised. stunned, even. really? big 🥹 energy ]
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okay well she gives him a totally like, are you kidding look.]
... Yes. [buddy you're very handsome like objectively what are you talking about. one of her ears perks up, flicking.] Do you not think you are?
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